Kicks are a bit on the loud side… and is a bit too much, and it sounds like one of the “It’s not my first, but I’m still beginning” songs… if you get that. The kicks are the main focus of the song, sometimes I actually ignore the melody because of the kicks. The melodies sound really nice, could use more variation and atmosphere, but it sounds decent!
Heading back to kicks, you want a consistent drum loop, like a 4 to the floor beat for example. For this song, I’d recommend putting a kick at the start of the pattern, and half way through, and you could also add a little melody in the kicks like the occasional extra kick that’s 1 beat away from one of the others. I’d also turn down the velocity of the drums as well..
Mainly the problem Is drums in this one, the rest is pretty decent! Keep forth!